I recall a relative that grew up in a violent environment as a child. I was not allowed to visit this part of my family in Birmingham, Alabama too often because her parents would physically fight each other all the time. I even witnessed the fighting during a visit. I remember crying and hugging my cousin while we listened in her bedroom. I was afraid because of the language and loud noises from items being thrown around the house. My cousin was tough though, she would say, "They do that all the time", as if it were a normal part of her household. When I my cousin stayed with us one summer I was so happy to see her and had a lot of fun stuff planned for us to do! I quickly realized that I wanted my cousin to go back home shortly after she arrived. She was so mean and angry all the time! She would pick arguments with my friends and me. She even had the nerve to be selfish with toys. My cousin and I fought for the first time which broke my heart. I did not understand why she was so hateful. My grandmother noticed the distance between us because my cousin went home earlier then planned. Thinking back I remember after all of the fussing we did, we both cried like babies when she had to go. We did keep in touch via telephone and letters. Through the years my cousin coped with the stress of violence by being sexually active at an early age and drinking alcohol. She had a baby at the age of fifteen that was given up for adoption and she dropped out of high school. Her parents eventually divorced and her mother remarried. My cousin is now in her forties but she looks older then she should. She still drinks alcohol even though her health is not the best. She is employed and seems to enjoy her job. Family continues to offer support and encourage her to take better care of her health, but I have learned the people will not make a change in their life until THEY are ready to do so.
Violence against children in Germany
"In Germany the law states that children are protected by local authorities who act as 'watchmen', this means that the authorities may be provided with "tips" from a neighbor or doctor if child abuse is suspected. It is often difficult for the German authorities to collect evidence because family members and victims are reluctant to report abuse". (Wolfgang, D. / ng) A popular case in Germany prompted the German government to speed up law improvements on child abuse and pedophiles where a 28-year-old stepdaughter reported after 20 years of sexual abuse that she was raped by her stepfather and birthed 8 children that he fathered.
"The German government will introduce stricter legislation for sex offenders where they will be checked by the police randomly at will. The government will also provide more training for child protective officers. This rule will apply nationwide not just in some regions as is the case at present".(Wolfgang, D./ng)
References
Hello Shelita,
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing your family story. It is sad to hear how the story of violence is spreading everywhere. Your cousin’s behavior is a result of a toxic stress that she was exposed for a long period and affects her child development and carries over her adulthood. According to the multimedia of the Center on the Developing Child at Harvard University (n.d.), “What happens in early childhood can matter for a lifetime”. Your relative grew in a dysfunctional family and the extreme abuse and violent environment affect her psychosocial development and architecture of her brain development. Unfortunately, she did not have an early intervention and her insecure relationships and toxic environment damage her life ending with addiction to alcohol and other health issues.
Center on the Developing Child–Harvard University (Producers). (n.d). InBrief: The Impact of Early Adversity on Children's Development [DVD]. Retrieved from http://developingchild.harvard.edu/index.php/resources/multimedia/videos/inbrief_series/inbrief_impact_of_adversity/